Home | Blogs | Diagnosis

Diagnosis

idea.nottingham.ac.uk image: Dementia Day to Day blogs banner

Topics: 
communication, men and dementia

The consultant came out to me and when we were in my house, he said, “Have you got anyone here with you?” I said, “No...why? Do I need someone here? Just tell me.”

And then he said, “Well, Paul,... you’ve got early onset Alzheimer’s.” I said, 'No ​no not me.' It was just a total rebuff. "I think you’re wrong, I’m fit as a fiddle. There’s nothing wrong with me."

So the consultant said, "I haven’t been wrong in 24 years." There was a long silence...and that was the start of it all.

For the next two or three weeks I was in total denial, my sons were away then, they weren’t living with me, it was just my girlfriend around, though I was living by myself. So, I just went onto the booze stage. I went to another pub (not our local pub) and I thought, "No, I’m not accepting this."

It’s a bombshell. About two and a half weeks later my mate came along to the pub and he said "Paul, you’re killing yourself. Everybody’s talking about you."

I realised at that point that Mossley Hill Hospital postd​iagnostic group had been phoning me up, but I’d shunned them as I didn’t want to take part in anything. I thought, well I haven’t got it so I’m not sitting around with a load of old dodderers. I’m me, I’m not like them.

But eventually I realised I had to do something, so I went to Mossley Hill and joined up with the postd​iagnostic group. But, I kept it secret. I didn’t tell anybody for 9 months. 

Your comments

You'd be very welcome to leave a comment on this blog post.  You do need to be logged in to leave a comment, if you don't already have a username and password you can register here.

Your comment won't appear straight away as we'll need to check it first: thank you for your patience.

When leaving comments please bear in mind our posting rules.

See more like this

Sally

In my simplistic, layman's mind, I visualise my husband’s particular, mixed dementia as a huge, underground labyrinth of long, dark, mysterious, twisting tunnels. This disturbs me greatly, particularly perhaps because I am severely claustrophobic.

Gemma Goodall

Over the last month I had the fantastic opportunity to assist with all three of Bev Foster’s ‘Music in Dementia Care’ workshops. In addition to being a performer, songwriter, and music educator, Bev Foster is the founder of the Room 217 Foundation.

Anni Bailey

As a first year PhD student at the University of Nottingham, I initially became interested in researching dementia when I was exploring topics for my Masters dissertation.