Home | Blogs | Time out

Time out

idea.nottingham.ac.uk image: Dementia Day to Day blogs banner

Topics: 
carers

Time out can be difficult to arrange, and costly, because unless  you are lucky enough to be surrounded by a network of voluntary sitters, you pay for one.

In my case, it is doubly difficult, as Wriggly Bum gets quite upset. Not upset that I am leaving him, the dear man is generous to a fault, and I go with his blessing, but upset that I consider he needs what he insists on calling a baby sitter, when he is convinced that he can manage quite well on his own .

So, I consider time out to be  a precious commodity, to be cherished and used wisely, in whatever way most suits the carer, to preserve his or her sanity.

It is well testified that carers' federations and associations, whether large, or small informal local groups, provide an excellent service, and are indeed a lifeline to many. I know too that many carers find tremendous benefit from spending their time outwith others 'in the same boat'.

But it is not for everyone.

For me, I prefer to spent my time out away from carers and caring situations, but rather in re-establishing a foothold in the real world outside. To be able to browse round a shop, rather than dashing in and out, is sheer bliss. And to get to a department store in town, WOW!

Even better,for me, are the few hours I help out at our local charity shop. I enjoy the buzz, the comradeship of other volunteers, the banter with the customers, and the feeling that I am still a fairly useful member of the community.

The pinnacle, my best time out of all, is the hour a week when I help out at the local Rainbows group. The fresh, eager, exploring minds of those little girls, their energy, their joi de vivre! Such a tonic after the sadness, the long days and nights spent watching an ageing and confused loved one, drift ever further into his own place, where I cannot enter. The time with those children is pure magic, especially if, like me, you have no children and grandchildren of your own.

For others, the ideal time out may be knit and natter, or walking, or a book group, or sitting by a stream. I just pray the all carers, everywhere, can from time to time have the freedom to do 'their thing'. I know of no better way to recharge the batteries.

Your comments

You'd be very welcome to leave a comment on this blog post. 

Your comment won't appear straight away as we'll need to check it first: thank you for your patience.

When leaving comments please bear in mind our posting rules.

Add new comment

CAPTCHA
This is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.

See more like this

Jen Yates

Crisis can occur in a person with dementia for many reasons that may be related to the person’s physical health, risks and hazards at home, social changes, behavioural changes, or problems that a family carer is facing.

Anne de Gruchy

Dementia Caring with Love. Here, for your perusal, is another set of ‘Tentative Tips’. As I said in Part One, please do take them for what they are – ideas shared in the hope they might prove useful to others as they have proved useful to me and other carers I have talked to.

Anne de Gruchy

I’ve been thinking about my lovely dad, about him sitting there at home with his little dog, and worrying that he might be lonely.